The Weekend Crash Episode 2

So my friend and I decided we were bored and decided to make a podcast internet show. It's commentary about life here in Korea but with a more light hearted twist to everything. It's more SNL than 60 minutes, but we think it's funny. We hope you do too.


Go Here For the Weekend Crash

"It's A Men's Carry-All!"

You know, I make jokes about guys carrying purses in Korea, but I'm beginning to understand.

Years ago when I watched the old “Murse” episode of Sienfield I never thought the idea would catch on. Living in the southeastern part of the United States, certain ideas are slow to perpetrate, even in the cities like Atlanta. Several times I remember even my grandmother questioning why I still carried a backpack after I graduated from college. Her reasoning? “Men just don't do that.” The most advanced it got was a briefcase and I always associated those with cubicle worker drones and wall street brokers.

(It's a Carry All for the Last Time!)

Then Kanye West and his “Louis Vutton Don” backpack shook up everything; a year or so after his first album dropped and suddenly dudes are walking around with brown Louie V bags. Still, it was (and still is ) a “GQ” concept. Where I come from, if it doesn't have two straps and goes on your back then you don't wear it. So even thought I was warned ahead of time about the metro-sexual guys here in South Korea, the man-bags shocked me right along with Korean guys walking arm in arm and male celebs doing cosmetic ads.

(Coming soon: His and her compacts)

However, it all fits. Look up the term “pretty boy” and you'll probably see a picture of the F4 guys from “Boys Over Flowers.” Younger guys here put just as much time into their appearance as the ladies, so why shouldn't they make sure the bag and tie match?

(Put in them the sunlight and their skin sparkles with glitter!)

While we from the west find the idea a bit of a joke, we forget one thing; it's actually PRACTICAL to carry a bag. In fact, it may be MORE practical for us who are just visiting. Most expats here don't own cars and rely on public transportation. That means planning ahead is essential because often going back home isn't an option.

(Yep, That's an NFL QB. . . )

Also consider that in 2010 people just carry more stuff around. Many carry laptops or netbook, various gadgets, mp3 players, notebooks, books, clothing, cameras and the like. And because bathrooms in Korea don't always have toilet paper, men often carry packets of tissue around.

(Man-bag AND Skinny jeans. . . . yeeesh!)

Want another reason? Then just go shopping. Stores often don't give you a shopping bag unless you ask for them and Grocery stores here even charge you FOR the plastic bags when you request them. The idea that all you need is your wallet and cell phone seems a bit dated with you consider all of this.

So while I can completely see the rationale behind carrying around a bag; the part I can't get my head around is the fashion element. Do they have to look so. . . purse-like? The fact that many of the bags here DO look like purses can be off-putting for some. There are already those negative connotations of manhood and sexuality attached to so many things here and the murse is yet another one. Accuse any guy with a messenger bag of carrying a muse and watch him squirm in their seats. Much of it also just comes from comfort. Many guys have no issues with the idea itself, but they just aren't progressive enough to take a chance on a bag that MIGHT actually be meant for their mom or girlfriend.

(Even The guys at ROKetship.com understand this all too well.)

As for me, I'll keep my backpack. I think I would look silly with a “satchel” slung around my chest considering my size and height.

Weekend Warrior Report: Rainism Assassin

I'll Preface this by saying that I talk a lot about the movie "Ninja Assassin." While I say there's no plot points to speak of in the movie, you have been warned.

So last week I had a day off and decided to check out the movie “Ninja Assassin.” I had heard about this movie for some time and remember it being delayed more than once. I had been skeptical about it when I saw the first trailer for it, but I was still curious. This was supposed to be the movie that showcases Korean star Rain (비) and introduces him to the western world. For those who don't know, Rain is Korea's entertainment God. He's been in movies, TV shows and is known in his home country for his flashy dance moves and songs about his “magic stick.” Before I came to Korea, all I knew Rain for was that dude that Steven Colbert had a feud with on his show. After coming to Korea I learned that Rain was trying to break into the American market and wondered how well he could do. Considering that he's more known for his music and his role in a Korean soap Opera, I doubted he could be taken seriously as an action star. (His previous role in a Western movie was in Speed Racer. Despite that steam pile's lack of awesome, he impressed the producers enough to give him a shot at his own movie.)

Turns out I was wrong. Rain does a pretty good job as a ninja. Critics didn't like the movie, but it worked well for me. The movie is gory as hell and the first 5 minutes set the tone for it. I wouldn't say it's a family film, but if you want action and fighting, it's the way to go. Just don't expect a plot. The story in this movie makes “The Transporter” look like high art. It pretty much goes like this: Kid is kidnapped and trained to be a Ninja. Ninja rebels against clan, ninja attacks clan and gets revenge.

I will admit I was expecting A LITTLE more form the plot, but wasn't upset by it. No, I was impressed by . . . . wait for it. . . THE NINJAS!!! Thankfully the director realized he shouldn't let a silly thing like plot get in the way of a good fight. However I would imagine it's tough to make ninjas look cool when they are supposed to be silent stealth killers. Somehow he manged to make things work. I watched this movie and thought “this is exactly how I would expect two ninjas to fight each other.” Sure, there some anime influence here (*cough cough NINJA SCROLL cough*) but it came out well. To barrow from my friend who I was watching the movie with, it has some great action sequences that you can't see well in the dark.

Now the one big thing I wanted to get back to the casting. Rain's co star in this is Naomie Harris (yeah, I don't know her either). She plays a Eruopol Agent who first learns about the strange ninja world Rain lives in. In action movies like this one with paper-thin plots, a girl like this is usually some sort of romantic interest for the lead. What I found odd about this is that she's a black woman. Why is this so odd? Well, besides the usual ethnic issues Hollywood has, I was thinking about the Korean angle. The whole time I was watching this movie, I kept thinking “There is no way in hell Rain kisses this woman.” The nationalist, conservative views of the country as a whole places a lot of value on pure blood. Koreans think very highly of their stars and watch their every move when they venture out into the world to gain fame beyond their boarders. So do I expect one of Korea's spokesmen to come out and kiss a black woman on screen? Hell no. At some point, Rain will want to come home to his native country. No way they accept him doing this, even for a movie. (Remember Romeo Must Die??? Come on!)

So this brings up an interesting point; could Rain kiss anyone else in Hollywood and Korea be OK with it? Yep. However, I think it would have to be a certain caliber actress. Even if his name isn't big in the west (despite me having to break my student's hearts when I tell them that Rain isn't well known in the USA), Korea holds him in a light equal to a Will Smith, Tom Cruise or Bruce Willis. He could go as low as Megan Fox and be alright, perhaps even a Kristen Steward of Twilight fame (I'm sure this would delight the females of my school who read Twilight and are waiting for New Moon to come out this week over here). But Hallie Berry? Nope. Jennifer Lopez? Sorry. Eva Mendez? Try again. Beyonce? Almost but not quite.



So with this in mind, I'm going to start a “Who Will Rain Kiss In his Next Hollywood Movie” betting pool. If you have any suggestions, please let me know so I can make a chart. This could get interesting. Place your bets! He is supposedly reading for parts now. America, it's about to Rain.

Who Was That Masked Child??

Korea is pretty cold during the winter and people here worry quite a bit about being sick. The first cold day of the year brings in legions of people wearing medical face masks wherever they go. 2/3 of a class might have on face masks when I come to work, and for some reason I decided to snap as many pictures of students as I can. Sometimes I have to sneak, other times I they are more than willing to appear in a picture.

Sports Day Is An Excuse To Wear A Costume During P.E. Class

Students flutter around in colorful T-shirts and pants. The usual blue and while uniforms are exchanged for green and blue P.E. Sweat suits. Out come freshly made signs written in Korean. The teachers are dressed down. It's my favorite school day of the year: Sports Day.



Of all the school days in the year, Sports day is the one I find most fascinating. It's the one day were the students are allowed to kick back and be a little wild. They get to paint their faces, wear costumes and funny clothing, along with oddball accessories. I have nothing to do but watch and observe this day, so I get to really enjoy watching the students.


Sports day is like Field Day for some schools in the states or summer camps. In this case it's class vs. class. There are various events, most of them kind of silly; but it's meant to be fun.



The students usually wear some kind of uniform clothing to match with their classmates. 2-4 might wear blue t-shirts while 1-3 might wear funny hats. This year one of the second year classes decided to wear headbands with Giant flowers on them. Boys as well as girls. Another class decided to wear animal ears. Another got Giant Bows.



They all make signs, most of which are in support of each other. Most are Korean so I can't understand what the hell I'm reading. However, many of them are in English. What's even funnier are the ones that are written in Korean to phonetically spell out an English word or phrase. Clever kids.



My role in this is very limited. I walk around all day and do squat. No classes, no tutoring. Just wandering around and talking to students and/or teachers. I usually take a lot of pictures because it's one of the few times I can get pictures unexpectedly. It also might be one of the few times students might willingly pose for a shot. So I get to pose in pictures with them and they act a little silly.



I spent most of my time around the 3rd year section. This is odd considering that I tend to favor the second year students. But many of them were talkative.



I won't go into a lot of detail, but will say I was a bit disappointed with this year. Last year seemed to have more events and the students wore more interesting clothes. This year they mostly wore their P.E. Uniforms with an added assessory or two. Also, the students seemed to have more fun last year. I recall several students doing commentary during events over the PA system. I also remember them having a Talent Show after the regular events. No Talent show this time, so no students showing out. I have no idea why, but I wouldn't be surprised if it had something to do with the more conservative principal we have this year.

Regardless, pictures are here for your enjoyment.

Wasn't too thrilled when I saw this article about EXPAT teachers and crime. I've learned that reading the Korean Times can make you upset. I haven't met too many people here who's been in real trouble over here. Honestly sounds like a someone who's trying to find a cause to get behind for election purposes. I am sick of political scare tatics, that goes for here and back in the U.S.

Baseball In Korean!! (Samsung Lions vs. The KIA Tigers) Oh My!

When I think of pro baseball, I think of greedy, over-bloated steroid users. I also think of the sleepy Braves games at Turner field were there is more entertainment off the field than on it. Sure, the mega stadium experience that is MLB baseball has it’s drawing points, but the main factor, the game, has been lost to me. I haven't seriously followed baseball in years, which is a shame because baseball is the sport that I first paid attention to as a child. Where I was a big fan and followed my favorites, that was lost over the years as the sport seemed to lose it's way in my eyes.



So you can imagine how odd it was to see a Korean Pro baseball game for the first time. I had was not sure what to expect but I decided to keep an open mind. This isn't the U.S., it's another place and they hold baseball in a different reguard than Americans do. In fact, the Korean National Team was runner up in the World Baseball Classic last year. I was very curious about how Pro baseball here in Korea measured up.



I was invited by the P.E. teacher at my school (one on the right in the picture below) to watch the local team play. The Samsung Lions, from what I’ve read about, are a traditional powerhouse in the K-League (KBO). However, it seems as if things have shifted a bit and they are on a slight slump. Still competitive, but not as dominat as before. Still, I jumped at the chance to do something different. So after school one day, we headed to the stadium.




The very first thing I noticed was that we parked almost right next to the stadium. Back home you would be hard pressed to find a parking spot close to a High School football field let alone a Pro baseball stadium. We walked over and bought tickets (which were dirt cheap) and my friend went to buy food.

Now here’s the kicker. He went across the street to the convince store. He actually bought outside food to the game. This would be blasphemy at any professional sport. You could sneak a rocket launcher into a purse faster than you could sneak in a pack of M&M’s to a Braves game. Yet I noticed people bringing bags of food and even picnic baskets into the stadium. I also noticed a large cluster of ajumas (old women) selling fried chicken outside. They were yelling at anyone walking past and would go so far as to run up and try to pull a person over to their stand. It was hilarious seeing about 7 old ladies run up to random people yelling at one time trying to get them to buy something.

To make things more interesting; I noticed that the choices for food inside and outside the park are NOTHING LIKE THE STATES. Back home, it’s all about “Peanuts and cracker jacks”, Hot Dogs, cokes, chips and everything in between. Here in Korea - Not a hot dog in site. Most people were chowing down on fried chicken or woofing down cups of ramen. The P.E. teacher and I ended up eating dried squid. It's like a really chewy, rubbery dried chicken meat. Not a favorite, but not bad either. The one thing that doesn’t change is that people drink beer during the game. It seems that alcohol is the universal substance of consumption at sporting events.



When we went inside, my friend the P.E. teacher asked me where I wanted to sit. Yep, that’s right. You can pick your seats. We walked around and found a spot between the upper level and the lower one, just to the left of home plate and right on top of the dugout. As the stadium filled up, I noticed people would sit almost anywhere. The spots on behind the last row were wide concrete isles, so people got cardboard and sat on the grown behind the seats and formed another row.



I thought it was great. Very odd to me, but I liked the idea. You get to the park early, you get a good seat. I found this very strange considering that movie theatres here assign seats. I wonder if it’s just for Daegu or is that universal.



The stadium is noticeably smaller than a MLP park. From what I've read, it only seats about 12,000. It is also an older stadium. But it also means there really isn’t a bad seat in the house. You can clearly see the field and I was glad to be able to do that.



Now as the game started, I noticed one glaring thing. This guy in a uniform started stretching on top of the dugout and these girls dressed similar to the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders showed up. Confusing? Yep. It turns out that the guy in the uniform is a designated cheerleader in the most literal sense of the word. This guy actually leads the crowd in cheers. He’s got a microphone piped into the sound system and he gets the crowd to root on the players. And this goes on the entire game. Between at bats, there are special cheers and chants much like soccer chants that go on. The girls accompanying him even hold up place cards with the words to the chants. This made things really easy to get into.



As for the girls, well, they are actual cheerleaders. They do dances and cheers to music, they help get the crowd into the game. . . and they are there to look pretty. They remind me of the dancers at an NBA game who do routines during time outs. They even do costume changes.



Overall, I liked this idea. Because the crowd is literally chanting every players name at each at-bat, they are always into the game. The focus is on the players and the game. However, this was done without the belligerent drunkenness that one might see at a college football game back home or other sporting events. There’s no way I would want to take a kid to many pro sports games (especially football) but I would have no issues with one going to a Korean baseball game.



I also liked the feel of being into the game for once. I’m sure it helps the crowd feel like they are more apart of what is going on. I know I felt more into the game than I ever did at a sporting event back home (save for HBCU football games. . . . nothing beats a black college homecoming). I got into the chants and tried my hardest to sing along (they are all in Korean so I tried to read the cards as best I could). I was walking up and down the isle chanting and waving a team towel. I even wound up on the jumbo-tron a few times. (Note to self: Large black man chanting in Korean is easily as entertaining to Koreans as it sounds. )



The only thing I didn’t like about the chants was that they were more about Samsung than the city. Unlike in the states, the pro teams aren’t known by the cities they are based in. They are known by the sponsors. So you wouldn’t say the Daegu Lions. . . you would saythe Samsung Lions because Samsung owns them. It’s on the jerseys and it’s in the chants. I find it so odd considering that in America, the teams are usually big parts of the cities they are in. So much so that teams take on the personalities of their cities (The Pittsburgh Steelers are a great example. You have a blue collar town with a workmen, middle class, rough around the edges mentality identity that the team emulated in their style of play. The Steelers are a tough Defensive with a hard hat style offense.). It just felt odd to say that I was watching a game between the Samsung Lions and the KIA Tigers. Still, it wasn't like they cross-marketed things to death. The stadium isn't named Samsun Stadium and the company logo isn't quite plastered all over the place. Just the team name.



Sadly, the team lost the game. I found out that the KIA Tigers are the league leaders and it was obvious why. Their team must have hit four homeruns before the game was done. Also, the Lions loaded the bases three times and hardly capitalized on it. There were a lot of runners left on base during the game. Still, I had a great time. I even caught one of the little prize bags the cheerleaders shot into the crowd. I ended up with gift certificates to Lotteria (Aka Fake MacDonald’s). I could see myself going to a lot of games especially if I decide to do a third and final year here. It was a fun experience and it made me like baseball again.

One thing I have to say I'm a little on the fence about. . . .





No "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" or Seventh Inning Stretch. I was hoping to hear a Korean version of that song so I was a little dissapointed.

The First Rule Of Fight Club Is. . .

The gym is small, cramped and wouldn't pass for much in some high schools in the U.S. Yet me and several friends gather there each week to get in a good work out, spar with each other, and share knowledge about different disciplines of martial arts.

It was started by my friend's Nick and Matt. Both are fitness freaks with interesting back stories. They share a love for martial arts, particularly Brazilian Jujitsu. Both are currently learning at least two forms of martial arts a week. As a means to share and gather with others, they worked out a deal with the owner of the BBJ gym the train out of. A year before I came to Korea, fight club was born. Together they run mini-classes mainly for foreigners on the weekends as a means to give people a taste of martial arts and a place to spar and trade ideas about fighting. Nick's girlfriend Susy is also there, usually working with the girls who come in each week (and does a good job of it).

This is how i spend my Saturdays. After meeting with Nick, he used his fanatical sales pitch (a jack-legged Baptist preacher would be proud) to get me to check out fight club. I was impressed and I started coming. At some point, it became a need for me each week. Sure, one of the best parts about Fight Club is that we all gather and get to meet up with people we consider friends, but the majority of us have a desire to learn more about the sport of Mixed Martial Arts and all the elements that can be added to me. I myself have only my wrestling background to fall back on. I turns out that it's really helpful when things go to the ground. I've also found that it helps with my standing game.

Each week I go home sore, bruised and/or tired from the beatings I've given or received from the rest of group. We have a lot of fun, but we also work hard. More than few of us at least want to be in fighting shape. Not so much that anyone wants to fight; we just want to be able to say we COULD train to fight if we wanted to. I have no illusions of becoming the next UFC star. I only want to drop weight. Some of the girls who come in only want to learn basic self defense, kick boxing or Taekwando. Sometimes the girls will even go off on their own and do Yoga. There are a few girls who don't mind mixing it up and learning how to fight, but no one is pushed. One of the rules is you put the work you want, no one is going to make you do something.

One of the fun things about this gym is that the Koreans who are members will come in and sometimes spar with us. There are a few who are training to become professional fighters and they are REALLY GOOD. I've seen guys smaller than my brother take down someone who's almost as big as me. I've learned a few little tricks from a few of the Koreans there. One of them I like to mess with because he's funny. He goes by John and he's a high school kid with a lot of talent. He gets a little cocky, but he's a nice kid. I sometimes treat him like a little brother because he gets a little high on himself. I think if he sticks with it he might be able to go pro one day.

The highlight of each Fight Club session is "The Brick". One man gets in the ring for five minutes and each minute the sparing partner changes. Basically it's 1 vs. 5 one at a time. It's tiring, but it's become a gold standard. Now because of Brendan, there is a new teir for the brick; the "Ten Stack." 1 vs. 10!

Recently, I've gotten very serious about Fight Club. I've seen that I've lost weight and the slow improvement in my technique. I also bought to pairs of gloves to spar in (I used to use the ones the gym provided - very stinky) and I've noticed an improvement in my stamina. I want to see more results and I want my skill set to improve faster. I can't do it just going one day a week, so I plan on joining the gym full time in August. I will be able to join in on any of the weekday sessions and I'll work with the hardcore teachers and students. I will more than likely have to rolled out of the gym the first 30 days because I will be tired. I've seen the workout these guys do and it's ROUGH. I know what must be done, but I really want to build myself up into a more healthy individual. Also, it would be nice to know I have the ablity to fight if needed.